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Children environment genes Parents Teenagers Uncategorized

Sibling Rivalry is a Triple-Edged Sword

March 28, 2017

Guardian.co.uk, Thursday 7 April 2011. The Milliband siblings Did anyone see the 2011 newspaper photograph of the hugging brothers, David and Edward Milliband (above)? Their congratulatory embrace occurred  just after the younger Edward defeated David in the election for leader of the British Labour party. There is something admirable about this generous gesture of sibling support – the older David so gracious in defeat after they had fiercely competed with each other for the esteemed position.  Sure, Ed and Dave…

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Children environment genes Parents Teenagers

From whence kids’ difficult genes?

September 14, 2015

QANDAKIDS PARENT: “My daughter [thirteen year old Chloe] is just like her father and her grandmother. She has their difficult, temperamental genes!” Chloe’s mum was confident that she’d nailed the source of her daughter’s volatile behaviour. QANDAKIDS COMMENT I had to smile. I’ve thought and said similarly about my children with reference to their troublesome traits. Many of the mums that I see in my practice have voiced comparable sentiments, eyes rolling, heads slowly moving from side to side: “Jusssttt…

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Children environment genes Parents Teenagers

Are kids leopards? Or hydrangeas?

August 8, 2015

Linda plonked herself down with a weight of dejected sadness.  “A leopard can’t change its spots! Do you really think a child can change his spots? To be honest, I’m not sure why I’m here. There’s no point. He’ll never change.” Her ‘leopard’, 13-year-old Sam, “had always been difficult”. Linda made the appointment because his inflexible, explosive behaviour had deteriorated progressively, together with his oppositional defiance, and “the family can no longer stand it”. “At the moment I don’t like…

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Children environment genes Parents Uncategorized

6 things you need to know about Minion madness.

July 29, 2015

QANDAKIDS QUESTION : “My quite aggro alpha male four-year-old is obsessed with the Minions, but I worry that they aren’t a good role model for him?  QANDAKIDS REPLY: I totally get your concern. For those who don’t have young children, the photograph above is of a Minion; a popular children’s movie character. Minions are essentially impulsive pranksters. Like over-tired kids at a chaotic birthday party, their behaviour is often aggressive, rowdy, giggly, annoying and – sometimes endearing. So, they’re probably…

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Children environment genes Parents

Children’s temper tantrums: time-in or time-out?

July 23, 2015

QANDAKIDS QUESTION: “My 7-year-old, Zoe, is an absolute angel at school.  We know she’s smart but our jaws drop when her teacher tells us she’s an ‘absolute pleasure’. We tell her we love her all the time and we give her hugs and kisses whenever we can. We’re honestly very loving parents. But, seriously, every day, over literally nothing, she can go from zero to a hundred in a split second.  She thrashes around and throws things and tells me…

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Children environment genes Teenagers

Kids are genetically similar! No, all kids are genetically different!

March 25, 2015

The argument Here’s John at consultation, father of 14 year old Jade, and 10 year old Mathew, with reference to Jade: “Teenage girls are all genetically the same. They behave the same, they look the same, they sound the same, and they all change friends as frequently as they change their clothes.” Here’s my  next client, Emily. She’s the mother of Lance, 8 years, and James, 10 years: “Everybody’s different. No two humans are genetically alike.  I like the fact…

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